iMusical: tonight @ Flashpoint

I was hanging out with my old friend, Julie Poteet, last night and during the course of conversation we started remembering some of our favorite iMusical moments. We were both in the opening run of iMusical last year. Which was very excited because DC had never done a long term improv musical show before and Travis Pleoger (who directed I Eat Pandas and Chicago City Limits) wanted to get something started with WIT. We auditioned and both started having alot of fun together. One particular show we both loved was when Colin Murchie (as a bear) ate my character who was suppose to have a romantic meeting with Julie's character later in the show. So, instead of letting that love interest die i sang a song to Julie from Colin's stomach. It was really fun and unexpected and that is what you get every performance of iMusical every time.

Tonight iMusical comes onstage at 8pm at the WIT theater (Flashpoint) in Chinatown with another completely made up musical on the spot. Yes, songs. Yes, lyrics. Yes, characters and music. All on the spot. It really is a unique and incredibility delightful (oh!) show. They have four more weeks of shows before they perform again in 2008. So check them out while you can.

Buy Tickets here! Read more!

Washington Improv Theater: Shows TONIGHT!

Washington Improv Theater kicks off their THIRD week of the Fall Run tonight with THREE great shows for you to enjoy.

First, is Exes and Ohs. You have read me raved about this show, you may have heard them on WAMU radio or you might have seen Justin and Natasha teaching a class or playing in One Sixty One. Or you may have not. Do your self a favor and check them out tonight.

Then they are followed by the The Lodge. A look into the sinister side of secret societies.

That is all capped off by One Sixty One, one of WIT's premier troupes. They are always fantastic. Seriously, guaranteed.

I know I will be there tonight. Also, nobody probably cares but I will be at Rocket Bar on 7th Street beforehand celebrating be-latedly, my 28th Birthday. (You are right Jason, know one cares). But please come see the shows.

8pm
$10
Flashpoint Theater
916 G Street NW, Washington DC 20004

Buy Tickets Here! Read more!

The Bomb Shelter @ 18th and Red TONIGHT!

Another Thursday, another BOMB SHELTER show at 18th and Red. This is the only place to see stand up comedy in Adam's Morgan, so don't miss you opprotunity to check it out. Tonight's line-up:

John MicBride

Nick Turner

Kojo Mante

Jake Young

Hosted by Mike Way

The Bomb Shelter at 18th & Red is the home of the best local DC comics.

great drink specials with:
$2 Redhooks
$3 Drafts
$4 Rail

Thursday Nights at 9pm

18th and Red
2436 18th St. NW, Washington, DC 20009
202-462-8844

Read more!

Hump Day: Open Mics

Never understood the term HUMP DAY. I assume to refers to a Bell-Curve, in which the middle part of the week is the highest point of the curve, thus the hump. But in actuality, the weekends (the two ends of the curve) are the best parts of my week. So i would like to think they are the "peaks", therefore thecurve would be inverted. I would then call Wednesday "Titty Fuck Day."

Open Mics for tonight are:

RENDEZVOUS in Adams Morgan, DC. Organized by our boys John McBride and Jeffrey Adrian. $3 drink and beer specials. Sign-up by e-mailing luckycatcomedy@gmail.com.
Address: 2226 18th St. NW, Washington, DC 20009

DR. DREMO'S TAPHOUSE in Clarendon, Virginia. To sign up e-mail CurtShackelford@ verizon.net.
Address: 2001 Clarendon Blvd., Arlington VA 22201

WONDERLAND BAR AND GRILL in Columbia Heights, DC. Organized and hosted by Kacie Wade. Sign-up by e-mailing comickaciewade@yahoo.com.
Address: 1101 Kenyon St. NW, Washington, Washington, DC 20010

Get out to some of these tonight folks. Happy Titty Fuck day to ye'. Read more!

Events of Today (or at least you think so)

***I was staning behind a guy in Subway today when he let loose and blew ass. He didn't even flench. He just unlock his gas pipe and pushed out a toxic cloud of sulfur. I was completely shocked, and somewhat admiring of this nasty bastards courage to rip a huge fart in public. As soon as it came out of his ass I started to worry that I would be blamed for it. Because in my mind he didn't look like a public farter, and I think I do. Everyone in that Subway is wearing a tie with slacks and I've got on a t-shirt, dirty olive green chinos, sporting flip-flops, and weating a ball cap. I assume everyone in there thinks I'm the farter, because I look like the poor bastard that didn't learn when and where to fart. But I just start to look around and sorta make eye contact with people as if to silently convey, "Did you just hear what this motherfucker did? He farted! He publically broke wind and violated our olfactory system. Please, believe me when I gesture with my eyes that I am innocent of this." Then I realized I pretty much hate everyone in that goddamn line and wouldn't even care if they thought I was the Anit-Christ. And then I wished I could fart but I can only burp on demand, and that's just tacky.

***I have been going to this imaging store to make flyers for over a year and a half. They all know me in there, except this one bastard who refuses to acknowledge the fact that he recognizes me. Everytime he has to help me he looks at me like we've met in another life, and then goes, "Hi, how may I help you sir?" FUCK YOU! You know my goddamn face. Knock the "sir" shit off and gimme the usaual you smug shithead. I hate that "sir" shit. He's 49 years old and younger than his grandkids and he calls me "sir". Gross and not needed. Instead of treating me like a regular customer he's put me on this alter of glorified customer and now I feel sory for the bastard because he calls me "sir". I'd prefer him saying, "Hey motherfucker you got you stupid ass fliers for us to enlarge? You can pick 'em tomorrow faggot!" I'd like that because it's like I have a friend on the inside; not some smug, propper "yes man" on the inside who'll never break the rules for me. I WANT A REBEL MAKIN' MY COPIES!!!

***I don't know how the people that work in Starbucks, Caribou Coffee, or anything other coffee shop can't be aware that there are homeless people sitting in there establishment. I can't stand seeing homeless people inside coffee shops. And it's not because I have some sort of hatered towards them, it's just that I don't want to feel depressed when I'm getting a goddamn cup of coffee. I'm going inside for a pick me up, not to be reminded that and I quote "goddamn fikus tree better not tell the marbles that the weatherman said it's gonna be another hot one...marbles don't like to sweat!" Make it a triple espresso because the dude with a dreadlock the shape of a beaver tail as pissed on my morning sunshine. I walked into Caribou this morning and BAM homeless lady eyeballing me as soon as I walk in. Well, I can't bluff my "no change" excuse as I'm fumbling for exact change because I know my medium Americano is $2.87 on the dot. Plus, it wasn't even hot today. It was a really nice morning. I would have totally sat outside and enjoyed my coffee if I didn't have to be at work. What the hell was she doing wasting of the few goods it is to be homeless? That's frustrating. If it's 72 with a gentle breeze outside...enjoy being homeless. It's literally NOT going to rain on your parade. HAHA...I wonder how many homeless have been having a parade in their head and it started raining and they're like "FUCK, FUCK, FUCK YOU BARBRA STREISAND!!!"

***That show "Little People, Big World" is great. However, I like watching it high because every time their normal sized kids come on screen it's like I'm watching that Geico commericial where the house is super tiny. I feel sorry for those kids. That's gotta suck. Also, I don't like the fact that the midgets call normal people "average" height. That's got to be the most fucked up math. There aren't that many fucking midgets to bring the national height average down that far.

Enjoy the blog. Read more!

Quote from Friday's Season Six Show

"My God. It is like you lose a bus load everytime you pump one out." ~ Stuart Scotten (explaining to Mark Pagan why he shouldn't masturbate so much)

Season Six @ Washington Improv Theater Read more!

Garfield is funny. As long as he shuts up.

I saw this a while ago and thought i would post about it because looking at it again, it is uncanny how the whole comic strip changes.

The hypothesis is that if you remove all the text of Garfield's speech, that the comic becomes oddly surrealist and in my opinion extremely more enjoyable. Here are a few examples from Truth and Beauty Bombs











Oh my god, the last one breaks my heart. Jon is so sad. Garfield's quips and cracks in the orignal/unedited cartoon only distract you from the real heart of the story; that Jon is just a loser whose only friend in the world is a fat, unaffectionate cat.

God, Jim Davis. Has any one reached out to you? Call me if you need to talk. Read more!

DCC4N is "Making Friends"

Welcome to this week's installment of "Making Friends", where we highlight our newest friends in the DCC4N fold.

Today i would like to introduce you to GWU's ReceSs, the oldest college comedy troupe in DC (established 1991). Recently they picked four new members and they are: Emily Murphy, Jen Gilmour, Corin Michalski and Kabeer Parwani.

In addition, their favorite alumni, TJ Miller, is gearing up for the release of ABC's carpoolers for which this was said about him: "Jerry O'Connell (the poor man's Steve Guttenberg) is among the stars, but the show is stolen by potential comic discovery T.J. Miller as an overgrown mama's boy who lives at home, fears employment and spends the day watching reruns in his underpants" -Washington Post. Link from The Apiary.

Also, to celebrate for all this amazing news, they have released a new video Our Constitutional Values: Option C

Myspace Page

I don't care what anyone says about highschool and college comedy. When i was at George Mason we produced comedy of the highest standards. Just ask Nick. He co-wrote "Frenchies Chasing Geese." Plus, when you have long lasting institutions like GWU's ReceSs and UMD's Erasable, Inc. you are bound to start seeing familiar faces from these troupes on your T.V. screens. It is just good business, like "Frenchies Chasing Geese." Read more!

DC Comedy Fest changes for '08

So the DC Comedy Fest seems to be finally embracing it's political comedy roots. Well maybe not it's roots exactly, but the fact that it is housed in the most political city in America. Below is from the front page of the DC Comedy Fest website:

dccomedyfest2008!

Submissions will open for dccomedyfest 2008 in NOVEMBER! Check back here for exact dates and other details.

As always we will feature the best cutting-edge comedy from around the world, headliners with special shows developed just for us, and auditions for national television shows for comedians on the brink to get their big break and much more!

Also, while dccomedyfest has always had more than it's fair share of political humor and comedy targeted at social and cultural comedy. In 2008, in honor of election year - we're going to have a venue exclusively for Political Comedy.

What does this mean for you, Mr. average comedian that talks about every topic under the sun? Will there still be room? Last year, there was basically a a sketch venue (Warehouse), an improv venue (Flashpoint), and a standup venue (HR-57). If one whole venue will be used exclusively for political comedy it seems that many of us will be forced to watch from the sidelines.

Does anyone have an opinion on this change? Or even better, anyone have more information as to exactly what will change? Let's do this DC!

Read more!

Do as I say Jesus does, not as I do

I just got off the phone with my dad, and goddamn it if I am constantly amazed that I am cut from the same stock as that man. Don't get me wrong, I love my father but it's mind boggling how being "born again" and blindly supporting George W. Bush can make someone a complete asshole to talk to on the phone. My dad and I speak once every two weeks just about and for the most part we agree to not talk about certain topics. Those topics being: religion, politics, and money. This has been the case ever since I was young. From a very early age I learned that if you didn't want to see Dad embarrass you in a public setting steer clear of all of those topics. He once yelled at me and my sister in a sushi restaurant because we spoke against George W. Bush's decision to invade Iraq. "You ungrateful little son of a bitches. You enjoy the freedom that this country provides you, but you don't want to fight for it....". Blah, blah, blah. Then he said something about how he was responsible for our "freedom" and that's when I reminded him that he was in the Air Force Reserves and never saw action. He got so mad that he left the table and sat in the car until we finished our meal.

The only way to have a pleasant conversation with my father is to completely agree with him. His Right Wing, Jesus Lovin' mind won't let him compromise or see anyone else's point of view. He never backs down. If anyone of the "No-No Topics" of conversation pops up you should just immediately say, "Yep, the blacks are lazy and the Jews are plotting to take your money, all brown people are terrorists, and I pray every night that George W. can rewrite the Constitution in time and serve a 3rd Term...that'd be great, and a clear sign that Jesus Love Us All!!!" Because that is where is mind is coming from.

So, my Dad and I are just having a little chat; shooting the breeze. He asks me about comedy and how it's going. I tell him that the DC scene blows and open mic stage time is scarce, but paid work is picking up somewhat. I start informing him that I think San Francisco is going to be the place that I move to next. He responds with, "Why do you want to move out there with all them gays? You should move to Atlanta and do comedy. But, there are a lot of blacks." (I often get the feeling that I'm fucked for life just from the DNA I have) I tell him that, "yes Atlanta does have a lot of black people, but that's not the reason why I'm not moving there." The next thing he said is where I knew we were gonna be getting into a fight.

"I can't believe what's going on down there in Louisiana. It's a fuckin' shame." And I know right away that he isn't on the side of the Jena 6. He's literally upset that there is a march going on down there and thinks those 6 black kids should get what's coming to them. His exact words were, "I don't know why they're marching. They have no business being down there. They should let the the government take care of it and do their job. The people in that town have every right to shut down and let those protesters know that they're not welcome." WOW!!!! I ended the conversation right away before I lost anymore respect for my father.

My point behind this blog is that it's amazing how people who are "born again" Christians are quite often Republican. Because the political views that make up the Republican party do not measure up to the teachings of Christ. Would Jesus fuck over the poor and leave them to starve? Even if those people were drug addicts, with 35 children on welfare...would Jesus turn his back on them? No, Jesus would invite them into his home, cook them a meal, put clean clothes on their back, give their kids some toys, and find them a job so they could support their family. You might say he's teaching them to fish for a LIFE. My dad always attacks me and says, "Why don't you do that if you care so much about the poor?" And I say, "Dad, I don't believe in Jesus, so I don't have to follow his fucking make believe teachings...YOU DO!" Would Jesus NEVER admit he's wrong? I fucking love the ignorant right-wing bible-thumpers who PREACH the gospel and totally miss the message of Christ's teachings. How does anyone miss the horrible mistreatment of those 6 kids in Louisiana? And to call yourself a Christian and speak against what's going on down there is fucking horrible. I grew up in the South and I know the mentality that breathes underneath social norms and the political correctness that has been adopted in society. It's disgusting and I know that people whisper their approval.

HEY THAT WAS A FUNNY COMEDY BLOG!!! It had racial stereotypes, christian slamming, social issues, and the uplifting chuckle fest that is my failing relationship with my ignorant dad. Tune in next week when I take on SUDDEN INFANT DEATH SYNDROM & TEENAGE MOMS!

Jay Read more!

This is NOT funny...

Domestic Abuse No Longer A Problem, Say Bruised Female Researchers

yes it is. Read more!

More WIT shows tonight!

Yeah, get used to it. WIT will have shows Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights until October 20th. And until October 21st, I will continue to bug you.

Tonight, Jackie performs again. This time with Baltimore Improv Group's show "Ice Cream Social". I still don't know if actual ice cream is involved, but would you miss the chance to find out?
8pm
$12


Then the second show begins at 9:30pm tonight with Season Six and Caveat. Look at how beautiful those people are. See them live and confirm your belief that they, yes, were cut from cloth made from God's own toga. God wears a toga right?


9:30pm
$12

Both shows are at the Flashpoint Theater in Chinatown.
916 G Street NW
Washington DC 20004

www.washingtonimprovtheater.com Read more!