A Rambling Plea

DC Comedy and Artist Community:

So, Jason Saenz left town for L.A. and then while on the way to L.A. decided to go to New York where he says he fell in love with Chinatown. Chinatown has a fledgling comedy community and Jason is sort of an overgrown gold fish in a small meditation pond; people are already referring to him by his own material, "Cum Dumpster"—of course it’s in Mandarin. Even in China they know you can call a hungry comic anything and they will bask in the attention like the lotus underneath sun.

Then there is Nick Turner, a comedic energy giant that has a departure date set for sometime...soon. From what I heard, his bags are packed and his conscience is wracked with guilt, which means he'll be looking to split very soon.

With Jason and Nick’s departure, so goes with them their enthusiasm for the DC comedy community and this website; which has left this blog barely pulsating.

I hope I'm not the only one with defibrillators because I really don't know how to use them, except for what I have seen on TV, especially in that movie, "The Abyss", with Ed Harris and Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio--specifically when Harris slaps her around and calls her a "bitch" a couple of times before she is revived. I heard Harris allegedly said that it was the only time he ever felt like he wasn’t acting.

This is the exact treatment DCComedy4Now needs at this very moment. We need Ed Harris kneeling over top of our bare breasted porcelain like creamy soft angelic milky colored skin, barking and slapping the Bah Jesus out of us, and we need to continue to rewind back to the beginning of that part until we come back to life or until someone starts walking down the basement stairs. And we all know what the sound of footsteps atop of the basement stairs feels like…awkward panic, the most uncomfortable feeling on the planet.

So what does it all mean? It means either we zap DCComedy4Now back to life or this website may soon have to come to a close.

(Cue: Battle Hymn of the Republic)

However, I would like to keep it going. I've grown fond of it...I like the wallpaper for some reason.

(Nah fuck the Battle Hymn of the Republic, opt for loop of AC/DC’s Intro for “Those about to Rock”…just turn all this shit off I can’t concentrate.

Anyway, DCComedy4Now has earned a place in my itinerary when I log on; hotmail, Gmail, check my mob, search Wikipedia or YouTube for whatever. Then when I come out of that wormhole, sometimes in a rather damp state, I arrive here or lately...not, which has had an enormous effect. The dormant state of this website has truly been a catalyst for some change in my life.

[Hit the jump!]

I actually logged off the other day, when normally I would peruse dccomedy4now, and accomplished things I hadn’t thought about for months. I got a lot done. Recently I just paid my car insurance, turned off the oven, matched up some socks--the stuff I've done off the computer is only what I’ve read about on many a blog. Ran some errands, the smell of the post-office was like a heavy dose of ammonia nitrate, I think I scared some people in there with my spasmodic reactions while waiting in line. I looked like Bob Goldthwait trying to clear his nasal passages with his eyebrows.

Another revelation was that I realized I'm living with someone, this extremely bad ass chic who I thought I remembered as being heavily tatted up(they’re just birthmarks), and she was really kind enough to let me come out of my own electronical Abyss unaided and didn't hold my 9 month web induced "walk about" against me. Yet I will say the outside world hasn’t been an easily intuitive web program.

The weather is much warmer than I remembered or prefer and I am starting to recall that I'm not particularly fond of people in DC, especially my neighbor who didn't recognize by my beard nor my soiled and mildewed clothing that had by then fused to my skin. The people at the walk-in medical center who peeled off my old clothing were a bit snarky which I think was uncalled for considering the severity of the Wikiwarp I had been trapped inside of and its duration; and especially when a couple of the orderlies and nurses furtively acknowledged having had their own similar experience . Also, the phrase, "Welcome back to the land of the living", I can swear to you, is used by the same people who refer to others as "Boss" or "Chief".

What am I saying...what is my point...I want to go back. I belong on the computer, and in my own warped reality; I belong inside the computer. And I want DCComedy4Now.com to be a part of that experience. In between Jenna, watching old episodes of Different Strokes, and looking at pictures of accidents on the Autobahn; I need this website to be my Mos Eisley Cantina—I need to know where my freaks are.

In order for that to happen, hopefully I can get some help. And if no help is provided then hopefully you can provide some patience. After Nick leaves, I am Solo. If I can move away from Star Wars and transition unracially (neither a word nor necessary) to Dr. King, if I had a dream for this community in DC, it would be that, it would not be looked at as just a comedy scene—but an identifiable artist community. How would you identify it? Maybe with a laser pointer.

There needs to be an artist collective, a supportive community. We are all not just stand-up comics, improvisers, actors, but we are also writers, film makers, producers, managers and audience members. In some way we have all worn different hats at some point in pursuing whatever we have set out for ourselves to accomplish. Some of us do certain things better than others. The more I go along with my own endeavors I realize that being a part of the process is really what I want to continue to be a part of in some shape or form. No one can do anything alone.

When Eddie Murphy was on "Inside the Actor's Studio" with James Lipton, it was refreshing to hear his honesty about how many people it has taken to help him create his body of work. He continually mentioned the lasting relationships he has held onto over the years.

The goals are always lofty when it comes to this subject in DC but it would nice to keep this website afloat with the singleness of purpose of being a useful tool of networking and creativity in an artistically capricious environment.So if you have any ideas or contributions continue to send them our way.

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DC Comedy: 4 Now makes good on it's name

If you hadn't guessed already, the title of the blog is in reference to the fact that if you plan on really making a go of this whole comedy as a career thing, it's tough to stick around the District. Even our own comedy festival would have you believe that there is no local comedy scene. So eventually, your best bet is to fly the coop and try to make it work in a larger, comedy prepared city. Well our very own Jason Saenz leaves us today to give it the old college try and in honor of that, Mikael Johnson has written a farewell letter to DCC4N's MVP, Jason Saenz.

Dear Jason,

Wow, LA. Wow, driving out to LA, wow. But you're doing it, right now as I type this on an early Monday morning you ARE doing it! Probably right now, you're somewhere in Tennessee maybe, pushing on another 60 miles or so before you lay up in some rustic road side motel. An old southern gal, Ethel May, still working the front desk, watching reruns of the Golden Girls on NIC, when you show up in the parking lot. Yeah, she was still up just because she can't get enough of that Blanche, plus she had a feeling, "That some lonesome stranger was probably gonna mosey on up tonight, needing a place to rest that road weary head". In the morning she'll bring you biscuits, gravy, OJ and coffee with a little note that says,

Safe travels funny man.
Sincerely,
Your dog, "Cum Dumpster".

But how could she know that joke? No worries, you run to the front desk to ask her how she knew your material, or even remembered it? Why would she remember it? How could something like that even resonate with someone? Do you think I should open with that? Why isn't Cum Dumpster quite hitting? But when you get there, she's gone. The girl behind the counter isn't even old enough to take the prom and when you ask her about Ethel May, she says, "Ethel who? No Ethel May ever work here…hey mister, will you sign this permission slip from Planned Parenthood?"

There's no time to look for the late night hotel desk clerk with a penchant for dick and dog jokes. However, peace will settle in like the tread on the tires settle onto the road; there are going to be experiences all along this journey. How could there not be--you're going to Califuck'nfornia!

This is just the beginning. From Tennessee, you could go south then west or just keep on towards the setting sun. Its been written about so many times, Going to California, by Zepplin, Stienbeck with the Grapes of Wrath, and Hughes with the Griswold's, and now Life brough to you by Mr. Saenz. There is so much ahead, take your time and soak it all in like the moment sponge you are.

Tell you where you can't get these experiences—going to New York.

Nope, no one ever talks, writes or even cares about when someone decides to pick up and go to New York. Michael J. Fox did once back in the 80's, a little film called "The Secret to My Success". You know what they call that film today in Hollywood? "Fox Turd". Whenever someone gets a script about going to New York or making it in New York, its always the same, "Uh, this looks like a Fox turd" or "That bin is for recyclables, that is reserved for Fox turds" or "Wasn't me, must be that Fox turd".
But you're not going to New York. You're going to California…nothing to worry about. California, where the weather is as pleasing as the women and the gangs are all bilingual.

Your jealous colleague and friend,
MJ

P.S. I will be out in LA next week, hope I could crash for a day or two. Hey, we'll have lunch!

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Nicky T's Birthday Show! Tonight @ Solly's Tavern

It's celebration time, bitches.

NICK TURNER: KING OF ALL IRRELEVANT COMEDY IN DC turns 28 tonight in what is guaranteed to be the best show of all birthday-shows-EVER!!

We are even getting the band back together for this special night.

We got Bryson Turner, on bass
We got Seaton Smith, on drums
We got Brandon Ivey, on lead guitar
We got Jason Saenz, on rhythm guitar
We got Will Hessler, on maracas

PLUS SPECIAL GUESTS!!!

Date: Tuesday, May 6, 2008
Time: 8:30pm - 11:00pm
Location: Solly's Tavern
Street: U street and 11th street
City/Town: Washington, DC

Also, he told DCC4N that he is throwing the $5 cover out the window for this special night. God, he is a SAINT!!

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Jake Young presents: Secret Comics Done at Work

[click to enlarge]

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Guaranteed to Score with These Shows!

If you are going to do anything other than watch NCAA basketball this weekend (forget them, you know your bracket is already fucked up) then head out to these above-the-rim comedy shows.

The Awesome Room
Tonight is The Awesome Room @ McGinty's Pub in Silver Spring, MD. This week's show crosses over and hits the paint with music, comedy, musical comedy and comedy about music.

9pm $4

Starting Lineup:
Tyler Sonnichsen
Bryson Turner
Kojo Mante
Jason Saenz
...and DC funk/fusion powerhouse The Champions!


Washington Improv Theater's F.I.S.T.
Also tonight thru Saturday is the final bracket of WIT's F.I.S.T. tourney @ The Flashpoint Theater. It is teams of 3-on-3 competing for YOUR vote. Shows have been selling out. There is only going to be more madness in March as we approach the final matches.


Tonight:
Yocko Cronkite vs. MimeHunters @ 8pm

Friday:
Blue Cop Town vs. The Achievers @ 9:30pm

Saturday:
Pay Attention To Us vs. Grandma Molly's Wayback Machine @ 8pm

Winner of Thursday's Match vs. Polygamy @ 9:30pm

Buy tickets here.

Note: Basketball puns are like comedy swishes!

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DC Comedy Spotlight: Hampton Yount

DC’s got talent. You know this, kids! From the guy who just wants to give you free money to the quarterback who sat on the bench for 10 years and then proceeded to dominate..until the playoffs….. this city knows how to produce stars.

This week’s Spotlight shines on Hampton Yount, who interestingly enough, looks very odd in a suit and has one hell of an arm. More importantly however, he is damn funny.

At first glance you may look at this Warrenton, VA native and say “Oh, who is this nicely dressed young man? He seems so happy to be here; I bet this is his first time.” Then he steps on stage, and you immediately realize that you were wrong. You just got thrown for a loop, and he hasn’t even told one joke. That is how it feels the whole time you watch Hampton perform. Just when you think you have him figured him out, he surprises.

By toughing up in bumf*ck dive bars that only Larry Poon could love, Hampton has now infused a hard-nosed approach into his energetic and rosy-cheeked delivery style. Did he just say that? Yes, he did. Did you just laugh at something you normally would not have found funny? Yes, you did. Does this guy also write an online comic strip? Yes, he does.

Hampton is regularly seen at the Topaz Hotel, Chief Ike’s, Top Shelf, Wiseacres, Bistro Europa, The Bomb Shelter, The Laugh Factory and the DC Improv where he has done guest spots for Ted Alexandro and John Mulaney. He also won the October 2007 DC Improv Showcase.

CATCH THIS KID!!!

This Thursday night, catch Hampton at Wiseacres in VA.

He will also be doing some Hyatt shows next month.

DCC4N’s Interview with Hampton:

Where did you first perform? What was your first paid gig?

My first time was at Attitudes in Blacksburg. There was no open mic so I had to do guest spots right out the gate. My first paid gig was at Maria’s at the Westminster Inn. It was hosted by Bird Knight, and Doug Powell was the headliner. I did ok, and it was a lot of fun. Doug Powell was so awesome. I was so lucky that the headliner was not only genuinely funny but also great to talk to. On the drive home, I screamed out the window “I’m a comedian now!” For real.

[Click the link to read the rest of Hampton's interview, plus a video!]

When did you realize that you wanted to do comedy?

It’s actually a sad story, to me. I had a lot of fun in college, and it was a really great time all in all, but I ran into a very dark period at the end. I really hated myself and had given up on everything. I’d just lie in bed for days, not eating, being miserable. At parties, I would have so much anxiety, I’d just walk away. I always wanted to be a comedian. I was definitely the class clown growing up, but suffered from very bad stage fright (I ruined a school play in sixth grade). Plus, I just figured everyone wants to be a stand-up comedian, why am I any different? Eventually, I literally said to myself “I have nothing more to lose” and walked into a comedy club in town. I immediately felt better. Oh wait, I should have said something funny.


Who were some of your earliest influences? What about them captivated you?

I always liked seeing comedians on TV. I didn’t think they were funny, but I was mesmerized by what they were doing, telling jokes and receiving laughter. No built sets, no costumes. Today, I guess I would call it the rawness of the setup. It’s just a person and their ideas.

The first comedian I latched onto was Chris Rock. I thought he was genuinely funny AND had a perspective, which was thrilling. He wasn’t just a joke machine like all the others, he was actually entertaining. I then saw Eddie Izzard a year or two later and was blown away, because it was comedian who at least was semi-similar to my own sense of humor, which I didn’t think could happen. He’s very Monty Python.

Then came the big one, Bill Hicks, at 15. I’m not saying Bill Hicks is the best comic ever, but he was a revelation at the time. Is there any way a sarcastic fifteen-year-old isn’t going latch onto an anti-authority figure like that? I idolized him. I really wanted to be a comedian after seeing Hicks. He really is the shining example of someone who reads up on their facts and has an undeniable perspective to go with it.

But it was actually David Cross’s CDs that finally helped push me. For months, I’d just listen to those two CDs every day, no kidding. He just carries such an unbridled hatred of stupidity and liars. He’s like comedy punk rock. He taught me that nothing has to be sacred and that realness is the most important trait of great comedy.

What was your first joke?

It was a long joke about an idea I had for a prank show. I explained that this new show on MTV, Damage Control, pranked a person over a couple of days, and that I wanted to do a show called “I’m Going to Drive You Fucking Insane” which took place over years. It is such a terrible joke, but they liked the whole thing. Idiots.

Do you prefer to write on- or offstage? Do you enjoy the process of writing?

I guess my only requirement for writing is that I have to be inspired. I don’t just write to write, because then I come up with these long monologues about topics I don’t even fully grasp. Let that be a lesson. For instance I don’t write about politics because the one thing I do know is I know NOTHING about politics. I leave jokes kind of unpracticed before I get onstage. I know the heart of the joke and how it should flow, but I don’t decide on the exact word order till like the third time I’ve done it.

I’ve also realized that my brain works, and every comedian’s brain really, like a specific filter. I need to cram my head full of stuff, and then pour out whatever it is I create through that filter. Problems happen when you don’t take the time to absorb and cram your head.

What about performing live do you enjoy?

I love hearing laughter, especially a baby’s laugh. I wish my audiences would laugh like a large group of babies.

Do you ever want to convey a message?

I wish people were more cynical and unforgiving like me. Hopefully, people will realize how cool I am, and then want to be like me. Like when the first Matrix movie came out.

What's hacky to you?

I could list the different varieties for hours, but I’d rather mention a recent moment. I was hanging out with Bryson Turner, and I went on a small tirade about fat black female comics while Comedy Central was playing a stand-up performance of one such type comic. I was complaining that that breed of comics tend to do very similar material. So I give examples to Bryson like “They always say 'I once dated a skinny white man; we looked just like a [Blank] and [Blank]'” or “Whenever I wear a [Type of clothing not meant for fat people], I look just like a whale in a [Blank].” There is a slight pause as we both look at the TV, and then the comic does exactly what I just said, but she finishes hers with “I looked just like a walrus in a burrito.” We sat with our mouths open.

What is your day job?

I am unemployed right now, thanks pre-written questions. I was laid off. I worked at this startup; they wined and dined me, and eventually fucked me. I woke up and they were gone, but a single rose was laid on the pillow next to mine. Seriously though, if any comedians are reading this and have a job opening at where they work, then e-mail me. I am looking for any line of work really. On a similar note, being unemployed does wonders for writing slumps.

Were your parents supportive of you doing comedy?

Yes and no. They supported me following my dreams, but they didn’t expect the dream would take longer than two years. So now they give me some crap about it. It doesn’t help that they don’t like my jokes, and my dad thinks he would be better than me.

Where do you plan on moving next?

L.A. All my comedy heroes live there and I won’t be happy as a comedian until I have won their respect.

How do you feel about the overall comedy scene in DC? Anything you want to change and what are you going to do to change it?

I absolutely love the scene! I get so excited sometimes when I think of all the crazy talent in the area. We get to grow in a vacuum; there is a huge sense of camaraderie; and there is very little struggle for stage time. I watch comedy online all the time, and I just hate so much of it. A good 20 of the comics in the area are funnier than 90 percent of comics on TV. The only thing I would change is more rooms. I am going to try and get this room in Vienna. I’ll let you guys know if anything happens.

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Someone Define “Alternative” Comedy for me

By: Eli Sairs

“My mother-in-law is quite over-bearing,” “my, how white folks misunderstand our culture,” “what if (insert thing someone at a profession does) did that thing in an OTHER situation, like (insert crazy mis-matched situation, rendering former activity outrageous), that’d be like, whoa!”

So it’s great we have an escape from this kinda stuff, in the form of what alota folks call “alternative” comedy. But I wish those alota folks could clearly define for me what that is. Here are the surface differences, as far as I can tell:

A. Performances are often at music venues, or places that aren’t specific to comedy.

B. You get to/have to stand up.

C. The subject matter and style are consciously different than what you’d find at a mainstream comedy venue.

So A and B are mostly based on Comedians of Comedy/Invite Them Up type shows I’ve seen/been to. The third is the main issue I want to explore. Some comics and fans I’ve talked with claim to prefer alternative comedy, some say it’s just an arbitrary label. I can see where they’re coming from. How different is it? “what if (insert Star Wars/Goonies reference) did that in an OTHER situation, like (insert location from a semi-obscure movie/comic)?!” -or- “Here’s Gandalf as a crossing guard: YOU. SHALL NOT. PASS!!!...and now, Gandalf as a teacher flunking a student…). Of course, there are more than just references (which can be enjoyable, even if a bit esoteric). Some alternative comics play around with structure, which I really do respect. Jon Benjamin and Jon Glaser do two-man hybrids of sketch and stand-up, and play around with characters, which comes as a relief if you’ve sat through too many slick, mass-appeal comics and predicted every twist half-way through the premise. I think it was Hampton who I talked to about how discovering the “Invite Them Up” album was a minor revelation for both of us. “There are people who get my sense of humor!”

[hit the jump for more from Eli's take on comedy from the fringes]

Eugene Mirman (brilliant) claimed that he knew from the get-go that only a specific portion of comedy crowds were going to be into him, and he focused on appealing towards this demographic. Sorry to weave personal details into this, but I’ve deliberated fairly hard on this statement. Some comics and crowd members have referred to my “comedy” as “alternative.” When I try to figure out why, I’ve been given vague answers like “it’s quirky” or “off-beat” (which I do appreciate, though others could claim ‘weird to compensate for lack of talent’). At the Improv competition, I had fun, but the crowd wasn’t really feeling a lot of it. I’d never say it went over their heads, cause then I’m an ass, but at the same time, I’ll defend the material. I’ll say it sometimes goes to the side of people’s heads. All comics can relate to this. I realize that all crowds vary, but I have noticed that mainstream (again, a hard word to define in this context) crowds don’t react the way younger crowds (age-ism!), people who I may relate to more personally, react. Should comics like this take after Mirman’s claim, and say screw the people who don’t get it? Why perform at the Improv for 150 people if you only care to make the 20 or so of “your people” laugh? A laugh from someone who I can’t relate to, with a different sense of humor, is much more of an accomplishment. I want to learn how to bridge that divide. Emo Philips is as weird as it gets, and he could appeal to the mainstream. For his time, was there anyone more alternative in approach then Steve Martin? He became a national phenomenon.

A lot of this seems to be putting down the idea of alternative comedy. I would like to say there’s no difference. But when it comes down to it, if given the choice between seeing or performing a show described as alternative, or a packed, rigidly produced comedy club, I would choose the former in a heart-beat. For some reason, I enjoy the thrill of snagging the attention of a conversing and indifferent crowd at College Perk, with no stage or promise anyone’s there to see comedy, more than I like going up at a place that’s comedy-specific, with lights, a great sound system, and an audience waiting attentively for the first joke.I think lots of “alt” comics could kill at the Improv, and similar places. Funny is funny, it’s the comic’s job to communicate why, even if the communication line is harder to find due to an off-center approach. However, if Zach Galifianakis, who’s said he doesn’t like comedy clubs, feels more comfortable at music venues, in front of the people more likely to be open to his style, should he jump through hoops to impress people looking for something obvious and easy to digest? This just leads to asking what drives the comic to do comedy, and what he/she considers to be “success.” It’s becoming increasingly obvious that this post offers no kind of answers; it’s just a question I wanted to frame, and I’d like to hear how others would pose or answer it.

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Next "Live Humans" Open-Mic Variety Show is March 11 @ Chief Ike's

Enjoy the flyer that you can trip on, with information on next and last week's show.

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DC Comedy Spotlight: John McBride

You already know he is a hero, which makes him more than worthy of this week's DC Spotlight. For more than 2 years John McBride has been bringing his laid back style to stages all over the DC area. Growing up as the little mixed kid in Atlanta, he has a very unique view of how the world works and it shows in his material. This loose style equates to most of his jokes hitting you before you even knew they were coming.

But don’t let his comedy style fool you. He is also one of the hardest working comics in town. For several years he ran the Café Rendezvous open-mic, which quickly became a favorite of local comedians to workshop their material. He also help run The Bomb Shelter @ 18th and Red, which was featured in a AMU radio piece on DC Comedy. Now, he and Brandon Ivey are producing the new Classic American Comedy showcase at Parker’s American Bistro in Bethesda. It debuts Friday night. Add another item to the long list of things Jon has done to help the DC Comedy Community.

He has been featured on the Comcast-on-Demand Open Mic and was a finalist in the DC Improv's 2007 Showcase competition. He has also worked with comedians such as Ted Alexandro and Bob Marley.

Catch him performing soon at:

Friday, Feb. 29
Parker's Classic American
4824 Bethesda Ave, 20814
10pm
FREE

Thur-Sun, March 18th-22nd
DC Improv
Hosting for DC Benny
8 and 10:30pm


DCC4N interview with John:
When did you realize that you wanted to do comedy?

I don’t know! I mean I guess this isn’t the right answer. It’s hard to pinpoint a specific time. I had many boring summer days as a kid and I used to watch this show “Stand up Stand up” on Comedy Central. I remember it was hosted by some really corny dude. But they would basically run the same stand up clips over and over again, and I would still watch it over and over again. I clearly didn’t realize it at the time but that show sucked and it’s not normal to watch that show over and over again. But I loved it...

[Read the rest of John's interview, plus a video after the jump!]

...Maybe that was an indication that I might want to do this one day. I also have the really cliché story where my older sister and her bad news boyfriend let me watch Eddie Murphy’s Delirious when I was like 11 or something, this is true and I remember laughing my ass off but I wouldn’t say that was “the moment” either but it definitely influenced me. But I always was pretty funny, my mom is my biggest fan, she thinks I’m hilarious (Shocking I know). I actually just called her and asked her what she thinks my first influences are. She didn’t know about the Eddie Murphy thing until I just told her, looks like I let the cat out of the bag on that one. But she said she used to let me get away with some things I shouldn’t have gotten away with because I did it in “a funny way (my moms words)” to her. She always said “You’re going to be a comedian.” Thanks mom!

Who were some of your earliest influences? What about them captivated you?

Eddie Murphy is the first guy that really influenced me. That time I saw Delirious (read above) was really the first time I saw a comic just dominate for more than an hour. One thing that really caught my attention is when he said something like “You thought you were going to see Gumby and shit…well you’re not.” And then he started cursing and just taking that place over. I was like whoa “You can just do that?” That was the first time I saw something like that. Also, my dad loved Mel Brooks and he would always get us to watch Mel Brooks movies like Spaceballs. I specifically remember him taking me to see Life Stinks, at the time I thought that was the funniest thing ever made and so did he. Then of course I saw other comics on TV. I didn’t really matter who it was when I was a kid I would always just watch it. I guess they would be influences as well. I have other influences also but you asked for my earliest so that’s what I can remember as the earliest. My parents would fight with my sister a lot and I would just drop some kind of joke to chill everyone out. I also proudly hold the honor of being the only person that can make fun of my sister without her trying to kill me. YOU try and see what happens son.

Where did you first perform? What was your first paid gig?

First performed at Dremo’s. First paid gig at The Hyatt. Thanks Curt!!!!

What was your first joke?

I think it was the joke about how no one knows where I’m from. I look Mexican or Arab or whatever. So I like to confuse people, like last week I went to a job interview, I was munching on a chalupa and wearing a turban. They were confused…but hey I got the job though, you are looking at the face of Taco Bell for the new Iraq…I start really soon they said…as soon as it calms down over there…which should be any minute now. I think that was my first joke could have been something else though.

Do you prefer to write on or off stage? Do you enjoy the process of writing?

I prefer to write off stage. That’s where most of my writing gets done. On stage I might discover a new tag or sometimes I even uncover a new angle for a concept that I never thought of. But I will take that off stage and try to write more on it later. I really do like the writing process especially when I got something going. That really gets me excited. I love writing because when you come up with something that makes me think, “I can’t wait to get on stage and do this.” I will say though, there is a direct correlation to how much/well I write and how much I am on stage. The more stage time I get the more I write. I like writing with other comics as well. They throw out a concept and we will just mess around with that for a while. Then I’ll throw one out and we’ll mess around with that for a while. Sometimes you get an angle on something that never occurred to you. It helps and to me it makes it a lot more fun. If both of you are sitting there laughing at a concept or a punchline then it will generally be a good joke. That is the real fun part to me. Also, if you are writing with another comic who is your friend you start talking about other stuff that is happening in your life and realize that something about your situation is really funny too.

What about performing live do you enjoy? Do you ever want to convey a message?

My favorite part of performing live is just when you get on stage you do your first few jokes and you can see that the crowd is really with you. That’s the best part, it’s like I really got them on your wavelength and they want to know what you are going to do next. That’s when I really loosen up and take more risks on-stage. I also like the surprise when you do a joke that the rational part of your head is saying, they are not going to like this because it is making fun of whatever demographic is in the audience. But then when the joke goes over well with the crowd you feel like you kind of got away with something. I don’t specifically write jokes to try to convey a message, I try to be funny. But if there is an instance where I can get something in that kind of proves a point I might, as long as it doesn’t compromise the funniness of a joke. But also I won’t say something that is against my personal morals. Like I am not going to be extra derogatory towards gays or women or just crazy racist or something because I think it can get a laugh, that’s not trying to convey a message but I am just being responsible to myself. What’s the point of having a funny joke if you feel like shit every time you tell it?

What's hacky to you?

Stuff I have heard before basically. People can do jokes about stereotypes and it not be hacky, but you need to try to take a hack(I’m clever) at it in a different way. You can’t be like ‘white people can’t dance’ and all you do is dance like an off beat white person, and that’s the joke. That is garbage, everyone has heard/seen that and we get it. Now does that mean you can’t talk about white people not being able to dance? No, mix it up, find a different angle, I’m not saying it will be the best joke in the world but it might not be hacky. If you are going to use a concept like that, I kind of see it like you have 1 strike against you already for the joke, now are you going to get 2 more by doing some tired ass joke with it or are you going to find a new way to attack it? Some concepts, like the one I just referenced may not have any other angles left though…but you get my point. With all that being said, if you start out with a completely new and interesting concept it really has endless possibilities to be a great joke.

What is your day job?

I’m with the United Way as a Development Associate as of right now. I help them raise money. I like to call it “paper chasing.”

Were your parents supportive of you doing comedy?

This is a really interesting question for me. My mom is very supportive of my stand up. She loves it. My father passed away before I started doing comedy. I often wonder how he would feel about it. He was a really strict man. No nonsense, but he did have a good sense of humor and loved to laugh. I mean I could get him laughing really hard sometimes. I remember I told him a story about my 7th grade Spanish teacher, Ms. Simpson. I was telling him how she pushed this shopping cart just full of all kinds of crap around the school all the time. She didn’t know any Spanish either and we just did the first page of the workbook for the entire semester. But she loved saying the word “Encantado!” a lot, and spit would fly out of her mouth every time she said it. I would just yell out “Encantado!” from time to time and just get him cracking up. But as far as him liking me trying to make folks laugh for a living? I don’t know how he would feel about it. I’m not sure if he would really be supportive or not, I like to think that he would be though. He just wouldn’t think it was a really good career path or choice…mainly because it isn’t.

Where do you plan on moving next?

I think New York. But I’m in no rush, I don’t know, stop asking me all of these questions…anything can happen.

How do you feel about the overall comedy scene in DC? Anything you want to change and what are you going to do to change it?

I mean talent-wise I like the scene. I think we have some really funny people. It’s cliquey but I don’t think there is any scene that isn’t. I don’t mind the cliqueiness anyway, that makes it fun to watch everyone try to measure themselves up to one another. I think there are folks that honestly think that they are the funniest person here, or will be the funniest person soon, and those for whatever reason desperately want to be the funniest person here right now. I think that type of delusion is healthy and hilarious. It’s hilarious because who gives a fuck if you are the funniest in DC(how do you even quantify that?). Just get yourself to the point where you want to be, where you feel comfortable taking it to a new level…whatever that level may be for you. It should be a different path for everyone. Now it’s healthy because everyone is competing, but for what, I’m not really sure. But for whatever reason we are competing and it keeps peoples brains moving and pushes us to come up with new stuff, and that’s great. I think it really helps the scene and helps everyone get funnier and funnier. Anyway, what I would change? More rooms would be tight.


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Recap of Solly's Open Mic from Tuesday

From The Man About Town, Will Hessler:

"...it was pretty good. Only 3 comedians - me, Eli & Justin. I was the first one of us (non-musicians) to perform. Not really a performance, more like a "man" speaking words into a microphone that occasionally formed complete sentences and had a linear logic with a humorous twist. But the twist fucked us (the us referring to me & Eli). What we learned is that hipster folks like their irony more on their t-shirts and less when it appears as words following the set-up. Eli & I did alright considering. Justin was what Justin always is, a destroyer of audiences. He did all of two jokes he normally might throw in the mix during the set and the other 5 minutes was him using the musicians own instruments, song lyrics, attitude and perception of reality to blow them."

Mad respect for these three guys going out and representing DC Comedy. Sounds like the open mic was a huge success for the promoters and the bar.

Not sure when the next one will be, but we will let you know as soon as we do.

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Why I Hate New Comics

by bryson turner

Ready for a harsh blog from somebody that you could have sworn was a nice person? Good. Let’s get started.

I had a really good conversation the other night with a fellow comic about why comedy scenes – DC being no exception – can often become very clique-y. A lot of times, there is a feeling among new comics that they are being excluded or that they aren’t welcomed by other comics. I believe that I have found the reason why – because they are. And furthermore, I think I’ve found a reason why new comics are often ostracized – they’re really annoying.

It’s a scientific theory, I know. But before you assume I’m being a huge dick by painting such a broad stroke, let me explain my theory.

[oohh boy. You betta hit the jump and read the rest of Bryson's post!]

Anybody who starts doing comedy probably does so because either their friends have told them that they’re “the funny one”, or because they’ve anointed themselves the funny ones in whatever social group they’re in.

Up until they arrive in the stand-up scene, they’ve used this skill to their advantage. Humor can get you a lot in life – it can diffuse a bad situation, complement a good one, and whether speaking romantically or platonically, it helps make people like you. New comics have learned to hone this skill, and their having become so good at it is usually a reason they decide they should try their hand at stand-up. “This humor thing is really working for me…let’s see what else I can do with it.”

That’s not a bad thought to have. That’s how almost every comic first got started – we wanted to see what we could do for ourselves by using humor. I once turned in a report on Walt Whitman over six months late, and I got an 84. Trust me – you don’t pull that off without the occasional well-timed quip.

But that’s exactly the problem with new comics – they come into this new social setting and try to use all the same tricks that have worked with regular people throughout their lives. They try to be “the funny one” and make friends on the scene by either being loud or being funny or gaining attention with the same “class clown” mentality that they’ve been using for years. It’s not that this is necessarily annoying, even though it often is. It’s that it’s insulting. It’s like, “Dude…don’t try to be ‘the funny one.’ We know you’re that guy. We’re all that guy.”

I remember when I first got onto the scene, there were people that I really thought it would be cool to be friends with. There were people who I really wanted to respect my comedy and see me as a peer. And there were people that I thought were dicks. I’ve ended up becoming friends with a few from each category. But it’s nothing you can control. I’ve become friends with lots of different people on the scene, but the legit friendships have to do with a lot more than comedy. I’ve become friends with Kojo because we like talking about sports and our failures with women. I’ve become friends with John McBride because we like talking sports and our occasional “why is this girl showing interest in me unless she’s working on a ‘She’s All That’-esque script and needs material” successes with women. I’ve become friends with Weems because we always have each other’s backs and can talk shop about anything. They’re not comedy-based friendships. They’re just friendships. When I get to an open-mic, I’m not trying to be clique-y. I’m just trying to hang out with my friends during the only time that we get to see each other.

I always think it’s funny when people I talk to from high school or work just assume that a life in stand-up comedy is non-stop hilarity, happiness, and fun. If we’re making people laugh, we must be happy, right? It can’t be like any other job, filled with stress, fears that you’re being leap-frogged by others, or doubts that your life is meaningless and you’ve chosen the wrong path…right? Well, wrong. It’s a terribly scary life, and any of us who are making a serious attempt to make it our livelihoods are naturally going to relate better to each other. And that’s the basis of a friendship – an ability to relate to one another.

So please don’t think the DC comedy scene is just one giant clique. It’s not. We’re just a bunch of different groups of friends that, when we see each other, like hanging out. We probably come off like we don’t like new comics. It’s not that – we’re just not your friends.

Okay, that kind of makes me a dick. But we all can’t be friends with everyone. That’s not how the world works.

What I think young comics often don’t realize is that we’ve all been there. I still remember doing a set in front of a terrible crowd and wanting to go up to every more-established comic there and say, “Look…I’m a lot better than that set suggests.” I still remember how demoralizing it was to get put on at the end of a show and then watch all the comics who I had hoped to impress – one by one – leave after they had finished sets of their own. “If they were really all about improving this scene, they would stick around for the rest of the show,” I would always think to myself. And there’s truth to that. But we’re not robots. We have jobs the next morning, and TV to watch, and girlfriends – or boyfriends – that we want to be with. I always thought comics not letting me into their circle was hurting this scene. But, as I was thinking that, I was making sure I was (at least somewhat) prepared for open-mics, and I was becoming a better comic because I never knew when the chance to impress would come. For those strong enough and patient enough to tell jokes for their own satisfaction, and not just to be cool, those perceived “circles of superiority” can be as good a motivating tool as any.

This blog isn’t so much for the young comics in DC now. Trust me – I feel your pain. Like I said, when I first moved into the city, I felt like Dan Aykroyd, in the freezing rain, looking in at Eddie Murphy during that scene in ‘Trading Places.’ And not just because it was at Nema.

Look. I know it’s frustrating. But if you love stand-up enough, you stick with it, and you eventually earn your stripes, along with the respect of your peers. I still remember individual compliments I received from Ryan Conner, Justin Schlegel, and others. Those expressions of respect meant the world to me, and they wouldn’t have if they had come on my first night in town. No, this blog isn’t for the guys that are new to the scene now – it’s for all the people who I thought were dicks when I first got here. And the message is this: My bad. I see why I had to earn my spot now.
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Larry Poon & Jim Marsdale Show this weekend

Two of D.C.'s most recognizable and irrestible acts come together on stage this weekend to share with you their stories of fame, fortune, music videos, scotch, and dancing with loose woman. You can't go wrong.



"An Intimate Evening with Larry Poon and Jim Marsdale"
DC Improv Comedy Lounge
Saturday March 1, 2008
8pm $10
Buy tickets in advance!

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Go F.I.S.T. Yourself

“Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages…”

We are just a week away from D.C.’s #1 competitive improv-comedy event!! That is right, WIT’s 2nd Annual "Fighting Improv Smackdown Tournament" (F.I.S.T.) is almost upon you.

Here it is from WIT’s official F.I.S.T. website:

“…Three-player teams do battle in a single-elimination style test of improv mettle where the audience determines who lives to fight another day. The action is fast. The tension is high. The consequences are severe... win your match and move on to the next round. Lose your match, and there's no road back but the one paved in shame.”

What is so awesome about the F.I.S.T (other than its name), is that it brings together improvisers from all backgrounds from all around the city. For example, competing in this year’s smackdown are some people you might recognize from this here blog, like Seaton Smith, Mike Bass, Mikael Johnson, and DCC4N's friend for life, GWU's ReceSs. Also, DCC4N contributors Aparna Nancherla and “yours truly” will be droppin’ elbows as well.

This is not an event to be missed folks. I plan on seeing as much as I can because 1) TICKETS DO SELL OUT 2) THE CROWDS ARE ALWAYS ROWDY AND READY TO RUMBLE 3) IT IS SOME OF THE MOST UNIQUE AND INNOVATIVE IMPROV YOU WILL SEE ALL YEAR LONG.

SHOWS START THURSDAY FEB 28th @ 8pm at the Flashpoint Theater in Chinatown.

Click here for F.I.S.T tickets
Click here for the F.I.S.T. Bracket
Click here for F.I.S.T Combatants

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DC Comedy Spotlight: Seaton Smith

This week's DC Comedy Spotlight shines on one of the most energentic and entertaining comics in D.C., Seaton Smith. After getting his start in New York, he moved to Washington D.C. in 2003 and began to develop his act as a comic who attacks the stage. If you catch him performing now-a-days at such clubs as DC Improv, Baltimore's Comedy Factory, or Cozzy's Comedy Club, you will definitely be going home with one of his characters bouncing through your head.

His ability to yank the audience along with him as he relates one of his wild stories has given him alot of attention. He has been continually featured at the DC Comedy Festival in 2005, 2006, and 2007. Also, last summer he nabbed an opening spot at the Opie and Anthony Traveling Virus Tour , where he performed with such acts Louis C.K., Jim Norton and Carlos Mencia.

Catch him while you can at:

TONIGHT'S "TOP SHELF" @ SOLLY'S TAVERN at 8:30
also:
MARCH 2ND AT THE DC IMPROV
MARCH 21-22 AT MAGOOBYS COMEDY CLUB

He also is a student with Washington Improv Theater and can be seen soon during WIT's Tournament of the F.I.S.T in March.

DCC4N's Interview with Seaton:
When did you realize that you wanted to do comedy?

I was ten when I thought I was funny. And then there was a talent show and I got on for rehearsal and killed. It was fun. But the problem was my stepmom was very controlling type of woman and she made me rehearse for her. Which is more painful than one would think. I did multiple rehearsals and I didn't know that you were supposed to do the same material I think, so I kept coming to rehearsal with different jokes and it got pretty bad to the point where I asked to just host and not do jokes. It was pretty bad. But I regretted not doing the talent show for real. I guess that's my earliest feelings of wanting to be a comic only cause it's seeped in regret. And that, I think, is the essence of being a comic. The overbearing sense of regret and shame.

[Hit the jump for more of Seaton's interview, plus a new video from his set at the DC Improv]

Who were some of your earliest influences?

Pryor, my grandma had "Is it something I said?" And I thought that was the most brilliant thing ever. I didn't have those stories where you would listen to them in secret. My family is big into dirty language. So we enjoyed those tapes together, like family time. Some people watched wizard of oz, we watched Richard Pryor Here and Now. Then when I got into comedy and I was frustrated with the form of opening, setup, punchline it was like a wet dream to hear Steve Martin's Let's Get Small. I had not idea of the brilliance at the time, only cause I wasn't born yet. Then Woody Allen's Comedian did a lot on structure. Bob Newhart Button Down Mind on the bumbling everyday type of guy that you wouldn't notice. But then Sam Kinison, his screaming was like music, plus he had a cleverness that's not given enough love.

What about them captivated you?

Well I mentioned the other ones, but Pryor then was just funny, now I can see from every aspect of comedy he was great at it. Characters, stories, one liners, clean, dirty, plus he could stop doing jokes and talk about something serious or jump into a skit with four or five characters. His ACT, in speaking of his hour to hour and a half sets, would have an intellectual and entertaining arc to them that at the end you would feel a sense of completion. He's like a book you can read a thousand times and find something different.

Where did you first perform?

I guess I answered this. But I'll tell you the second place I performed. I was 14 and there was a talent show at a religious camp I used to go to. You want to talk about good crowds. I got applause breaks before I told a joke. I mean "introducing seaton smith" applause. "hello" more applause. It really did wonders for the delicate teenage ego. then I did a show in newark, nj, another talent show but not religious, with my mom in the audience and I bombed so bad that in the car my mom told me never to invite her to another show until I get famous. So much for the delicate teenage ego.

What was your first paid gig?

I want to say it was Jillian's. I want to say Sean Savoy (then Sean Joxe) was the first to give me some love. I had some really good times at Jillians, and some equally bad times.

Do you prefer to write on or off stage?

Both. I go in spurts where I'll try different writing exercises to flesh the ideas out. But then a joke will reach as far as I can take it and I'll brainstorm with a friend. But that's when I have an idea of what I want to say. Sometimes i have no idea what I want to say about a particular idea so I'll go on stage and hope that the adrenaline will cause a creative moment/magic. whatever.

Do you enjoy the process of writing?

Yes. when I'm doing it. When I'm staring at the page no. When I'm laying in bed thinking about it, sometimes.

What about performing live do you enjoy?

Intimacy. I really like the feeling of a group of people coming together and seeing the same thing and having the same feeling about something. There is an intimacy in that that can feel warm. It's only when you get off stage do you realize somewhere in the back of your head it's not real or it's so temporary that you can't real suck it in. But sometimes aftershocks of it all hit you later at night when you're alone and you feel it again, except a little less. But it's great just the same.

Do you ever want to convey a message?

I want to. But I don't know what it is in general. I know when I speak about race I try to speak on my disposition in the societal paradigm. Meaning I don't say "white people be fucking up" kind of humor which comes from an attacking place. I try to speak on how we all kind of relate cause we're all kind of squeezed in this tight space and we've established rules with one another about how to conduct ourselves. Like I have a joke about how white people can't say the word "African-American" but I only mention only because it speaks to all these rules in place that white people are afraid a rule is being broken just by mentioning that black exists, but on the flip side this hesitation isn't out of nowhere because black people are so paranoid of racism/or racist moments that we're looking for white people to get one syllable wrong. See rules. But that's not my whole act. It's really 7 minutes. I don't know what else I talk about. I hate life.

What's hacky to you?

Not speaking from your own life, experience, perspective, or your own funny. We all have our own funny and if you're not looking inside yourself to find it then it's hacky. Or if you're trying to be anything else than funny ie dirty, weird, offensive without trying to be funny, it's not hacky but it isn't comedy, it's more or less bullshit.

Were your parents supportive of you doing comedy?

Very much so. Too much. They'd want to sit and workout shit with me when I was a teenager. My father keeps calling me telling me I need to be like Tyler Perry. It hurts me to tell him that it will never happen. My mother would make me do choirs and when I argued she'd say, "you'll get a joke out of it." It never happened ma.


Where do you plan on moving next?

New York City. I'm not sure why. Really. I have no idea what to do. I know my options. But they don't jump out at me as appetizing. I just want to be really really really really (infinite symbol) funny and just assume something good will happen. I don't know what though.

How do you feel about the comedy scene in DC?

That's it's a good place to start. The clique thing doesn't bother me mainly because I don't like people enough to want to be in their friend group. I think that would annoy me. As long as I get stage time. And DC has afforded me a lot of stage time. For about 12 calendar months i was doing about 7 days a week. That was fun. I went a little crazy and I was ugly to a lot of people but I grew. I think anyway. People like to tell me I'm a natural onstage. Which kind of annoys me, cause i'm not a natural, I just was onstage so much that it looks easy and natural. Also when they say you're natural they're making a point to say that they don't like my material. Moral of the story: I really would like to stop talking to people.

-What would you change?

Me personally? Nothing. I don't want to do anything except write and perform, but if I wasn't moving, I'd just create more rooms. That's what comedy is, performance.




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More Music/Comedy @ Solly's this week

Wow, Solly's is definitely becoming THE place for local music and comedy, with the announcement of another show popping up this week.

Mostly Monkee, D.C.’s only gypsy cow-punk reggae band continues its tradition of electric live performance events by teaming up with musical improv-comedy punksters the Slut Rockets on Thursday night February 21st, 2008 at Solly’s U Street Tavern located at 1142 11th Street (at the corner of U Street and 11th NW).

Doors open at 8:30 PM
The Slut Rockets start at 9:15
Mostly Monkee follows at 10:30 PM.
Cover charge is $5.00.

The Slut Rockets live show features a musical improv-comedy format that will take audience suggestions and build improvised punk songs based on them.

"musical improv-comedy punksters"?

Does it still count as improv if the audience can't understand you?

"Your suggestion is RAWAAAWWWRRRR!"

[no more clicky jumpy]

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Caveat @ The Comedy Spot in Ballston

Washington Improv Theater's most energetic troupe, Caveat, explodes all over the Comedy Spot next weekend.

And they are debuting a new experimental format. Calling in one of their former members, James Williams, the show will be a plethera of music, lightning and love.

Yes, they have the power to create romantic clouds of music.

8PM Thursday Feb 21 - $10
8PM Friday Feb 22 - $15
7:30PM Saturday Feb 23 - $15
CLICK FOR TICKETS!

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New Open Mic opening @ Solly's Tavern

Ah, another interesting performance opportunity folks. Andy, a local musician from the band The Humans, is starting his own variety show open-mic beginning Tuesday the 26th @ Solly’s U Street Tavern. The show invites any musicians, jugglers, sword swallowers, solo acts, duets, singers, comedians and poets in town to come out and perform. Sounds like the making of a very interesting evening.


Sign up is done on site.

Solly’s is turning into a pretty happening spot, huh?

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Happy Valentine’s Day, DC!!

The holiday of mandatory commercialized love is upon us! Embrace it or die!

Even still, I am not going to write about how I “love comedy” or how she is my “soul mate”. That type of sophisticated analogy is better left for a more personal affair. Instead, let’s celebrate V-Day by doing what we truly love; acting like anonymous, hacky idiots on a meaningless blog!

So without further ado..

DCC4N presents:
The Top Things You Don't Want to Hear on a First Date

1."Oh, this is clearly the home where a rapist lives."

2."Hmmm...so like WHO'S LINE IS IT ANYWAYS?"

3."I once beat a Samoan man in a finger banging contest."

4."So you're a comedian? ...Really?"

5."Fuck Shaun Taylor! Fuck Health Leger! There is a WAR going on!"

6."This barbeque sauce tastes funny."

7."Do they allow valour track suits in this restuarant?

8."Hi, I’m Curt. Here is a 10 page printout of how this date should go."

9."You ever have gravy drank out your butt?"

10."I have a whole bottle of olive oil back at my place."

Got one of your own, sugah? We won’t judge you. We love you just the way you are, DC.

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THE ART OF BARKING AND THE FEAR OF COMEDY

BY: Tyler Sonnichsen

This March will mark the two-year anniversary of the Laughing Lizard Comedy Showcase. Like every room, it took time to get going and established. To start a comedy show like it, all you need is some motivation, and a cadre of incredibly talented and supportive friends to keep the shows consistently good. Actually, you need a lot more when it comes to starting a comedy room, but I'm going to get right into a few simple points, and elaborate on exactly one of them.

1. Just fuckin' do it.
2. Run the room the way you would want a room to be run.
3. Get to know as many people at the bar/club/coffeeshop/wherever as well as you can.
4. If there is a sidewalk or visible roadway, SANDWICH BOARD SIGN!! For real.
5. Unless you're in a situation where you absolutely need to charge admission or pay anyone, don't.
6. Deal with the fact that at times, you're going to have to be an asshole.
7. Don't be too proud to bark for the show, ever.

[That last point, strangely enough, has led to some of the most interesting moments in the history of the room so far. HIT THE JUMP!]

Old Town Alexandria is full of all types around 9-10 pm on any given Saturday evening: locals, tourists, old people, young people, different races, languages, religions, and the most otherworldly of the species, Bachelorette Parties. Old Town dwellers are indeed a diverse crowd sometimes, but most of them all have one thing in common- they are terrified of free comedy.

What terrifies people of free comedy so much? They're afraid that the comics are just going to make fun of them. After all, a free comedy show can't be THAT good, can it? My roommate's girlfriend admitted to me that she'd had a similar concern until they finally came out to a show last summer, and they watched Justin Schlegel bring the house down. I appreciated her admitting that to me, and that she's reformed her ways. That prejudice has been the bane of some of the best comedy shows. Honestly, a group of twenty-something barhoppers knows what they're getting into by crossing the street and heading into the Rock It Grill. Sure, hearing someone karaoke-ing out shitty Live songs from 1994 isn't nearly as much fun as going to a standup show full of people you have never heard of, but these people don't know that. Plus, at other places, they can drunkenly shout at each other over the music.

So, the next best thing to prepare for a show and make an event out of it is to assemble in front of the venue, as many comics do before shows, and announce it with an appropriate amount of enthusiasm to potential audience members.

Many of our on-the-street techniques have gained attention. Take, for example, Aparna Nancherla and John McBride doing their best capoeira-style fighting. Sure, it has nothing to do with comedy, but it amuses us.

We often get those jackasses who say, "Oh, are you guys comedians?? Tell us a joke!" We just use that 'in' to say that they need to come in, grab a cheap drink, and pay no cover to watch us do it.

If you're Tyler Richardson, gently imply that someone's racist if they ignore you and don't come to the show.

A couple of times we get people who claim they're funnier than any of the comedians, such as one woman last November, who, as Doug Powell commented, looked like Rod Stewart came in her hair. (That makes perfect sense if you saw her). These people are nearly shoe-ins to be hecklers, but everyone deserves a chance, since an audience member is an audience member is an audience member. And people do surprise you and settle down a lot once they sit down.

The amount of people who came in expecting nothing and wound up amazed is one of the greatest assets to running a comedy room. Like my friend Jake Young, who just started the successful first installment of the Awesome Room in Silver Spring, so frequently says, we need to do what we can to awaken the sleeper cells of DC comedy fans out there who don't realize yet what a gold mine of entertainment they're sitting on. And as friend and DCC4N founder Nick Turner says so much that it's starting to lose its meaning, "Let's Do This, DC!"

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Kevin Smith, Hampton and You!

Hampton here, spinning a personal message to my crew in the D.C.verse. I have always been interested in what famous comedians influenced my favorite local comics. Usually, they say “*Blank* really changed everything for me” except replace blank with a very famous comedian (Roseanne). While that’s interesting, I realized recently that maybe that really isn’t the biggest influence on people’s comedy. I didn’t really register good stand up comedy until I was about 15 years old and for years before that I was already the funniest kid on planet earth.

So something had to start me on that path, right? I can think of many non-comedian things that influenced me, but I am going to choose one for the purposes of this blog. And I would like YOU, the comedian reader, to comment and leave an influence that helped mold you; anything that isn’t a comedian. Write about: a cartoon, a relative, a show, a book, a movie, a musician, an event, a comic strip, or anything that helped make you who you are. For myself I have chosen the movie Clerks.

[Read the rest, or just jump to the part where you get to talk.]

Now a lot of people don’t like Kevin Smith, but that’s not important. This isn’t about my love of Kevin Smith, it’s about how, growing up, I watched the movie Clerks. When I was around 10 years old, I hung out at my friend Nick’s house close to every single weekend for about 5-6 years (free Sunny D). We would practice flips on sofa cushions and play Super Nintendo till our eyes bled pixels. And at night we would set up the TV and watch movies until we fell asleep. Nick only owned three R rated movies: Terminator 2, Highlander 2, and Clerks. I can say with all certainty that I have seen all three of these movies in the hundreds. I cannot watch any of these movies now, because now not only do I know how Terminator 2 ends I know how many times Sarah Connor blinks when the Psych Ward guard licks her face (trick question. None!). It might also interest you to know I watched Highlander 2 and Terminator 2 all those times without ever having once seen the first movies in those series. I am that cool.

So, back to Clerks. I loved this movie. It’s basically a movie where nothing happens except people talking and I, a 10 year old, was totally engrossed. Every time. I barely understood a third of what they were saying (raised Catholic, very naïve, scared of own dick) but I kept watching. Over those 6 years I understood more and more of the movie and began to appreciate it for different reasons. I think the important thing I took from that movie was the foul language.

I am completely sincere. That movie taught me how to swear. It changed how I made kids laugh. Now I wasn’t just silly, but could say things that would elicit laughter. It set me on a path of passion for the well crafted sentence. When I listen to Patton Oswalt the best thing I take away from it is how he sets up his adjectives and adverbs like a composer. It’s not what you say; it’s how you say it.

Clerks also taught me the value of minimalism. It’s about relationships and nuances. It’s the details of life that make life interesting. Like I said, the story is very low key, but when you watch it go down it seems like all life depends on the end of that day. Now I admit, Clerks is not even the best example of these ideas, and when I watch it today I almost cringe, but at that time and place in my life it was a big deal. That’s the real deal Holyfield.

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