I don’t want to brag, but I’m the best Finger Banger that I know. Seriously, I’m fucking amazing at Finger Banging. Sure, other guys may be well endowed and have a great personality…but can they finger bang? Can’t nobody Finger Bang like me…you can take that to the bank.
How do I begin to properly illustrate the awesomeness that is my Finger Banging ability? I can finger bang fast or slow. I can finger bang sweet or I can finger bang mean, but one thing I promise you is that it’ll be the best finger bang of your life. I take pride in my finger banging. I don’t just stick my hand down your pants and try to finger bang you; oh no, I put on a production. I pretend that my index and middle finger are little legs, and I walk them around the audience (vagina). Then it’s showtime!
Always start slow and with one finger. If you don’t know that you shouldn’t be finger banging. I go slow, but it’s not boring. I incorporate a “swirling” motion (think of cleaning out a jar of peanut butter with your finger). Once I’ve enter and gotten the juices flowing…let the bangin’ begin. I go full speed, or what I commonly refer to as the “pistons of fury”. I finger bang like that for a good solid 2 minutes non-stop. Then I pull back on the throttle, light a candle and start with making finger banging love. Slow, long strokes that are precise and each one is thoughtful and kind. I switch up between 1 and 2 fingers. Then I do my “jumping jacks” (also known as synchronized swimming) move. That is a one way ticket to Ecstasyville: population Lucky Lady; Mayor: ME! But oh wait, it’s not even over. Then I go into my closer: “Tunneling the Dough”. I use two fingers and viciously “whip” the vagina into crazy orgasmic mess. It’s like I’m beating eggs, but it’s not eggs…it’s a woman’s pleasure zone. And when your eyes roll to the back of your head you know…you just got Finger Banged by a pro!
Tell me that a Finger Bang from me doesn’t sound like Heaven. If you say no you’re either a liar, or hate finger banging. I can’t imagine how anyone could hate finger banging. Finger banging is my gift and I want to share it with the world. So, when you see me out on the streets, don’t be afraid to ask for a Finger Bang, cause I’m more than willing to share my gift, and let everyone know exactly what a REAL Finger Bang should be.
Smell the success!
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